Crescent Grove

This site is mostly my devotion to the Seldarine goddess Sehanine Moonbow, whom I worship as being an intra-Solar Mercurial (Dungeons & Dragons) combination of the Vedic (intra-Solar Venusian) goddesses Lakṣmī and (Candra's) Rohiṇī. Sehanine and Corellon are a couple steps up in the ascension process from where the two of us would still be Svāhā and Agni, before centuries from now becoming Sarasvatī and Brahmā, but worship is like that (upward). I've got some interesting theurgical “musings” I'd like to share here, but please limit your judgments as to questions of my referencing any specific person, unless I do in fact state a specific name, which a couple times I will.

Sehanine is Corellon's beloved; Corellon is Sehanine's creator. Sehanine is Corellon's shadow; Corellon is Sehanine's reflection. Sehanine is the moon; Corellon is the moon's crescent. Sehanine is the night sky; Corellon is the sun and all the stars. (Mordenkainen's Tome of Foes, 2018, p. 46)

In stories of the Seldarine, Sehanine is Corellon's steadfast companion, the one being who can persuade Corellon to pause and reflect rather than allow his emotions to rule him. Corellon can be resplendent with joy or shaking with anger, but a word or a look from Sehanine is enough to check or subtly alter Corellon's mood and behavior, redirecting the god to a less extreme course of action. Some elven legends treat Sehanine as Corellon's spouse or as a favored child, but other stories hint at a deeper truth. They say Sehanine was formed from the first drop of blood spilled from Corellon's body, and so she reminds Corellon that even as a divine being, he can be harmed. (ibid., p. 47)

The years 1998 through 2016 were very crucial in the ascension to the beginnings of our own sattvic (good-natured) three-dimensional universal parallel here on Earth. I call them the Nexus (May 2nd / 3rd of 2007) and its Crises (September 11th of 2001 and December 21st of 2012). Numerous major battles were fought through these two decades, in my own life including Gandalf vs. the Balrog of Moria and Corellon vs. Gruumsh. I'll describe the second of those here, as it is relevant to our specific theme.

During the first of those two decades, I was with my (adoptive) cousin, whom I eventually married, though briefly. I have since identified her as my Araushnee (D&D's Lolth), and told her as much while she was divorcing me in the course of that decade. The (orcish god) Gruumsh in this story was actor David Hasselhoff, whom at the time I was worshiping as being Viṣṇu above, though I now know him to be the Vedic Dhruva and an authorized Viṣṇu in the context where there are several of such in this specific universe.

In the time before time, the gods sprang fully formed from the primeval void. All these first gods were equally endowed with the power of the cosmos, and each claimed jurisdiction over certain aspects of the universe. In a spirit of cooperation that has not been seen since, they built the worlds together, separating matter from energy, land from sea, and sky from earth.

The wiser gods banded together and called themselves the Seldarine, or Brothers and Sisters of the Wood. While the other gods squabbled over custody of the various aspects of the worlds they had jointly created, the Seldarine used their power to cover the barren lands of the world with lush forests, tall grasses, flowers of incredible beauty, and animals of every kind. Moradin, Yondalla, and Garl Glittergold allied with the Seldarine, claiming the mountains, plains, hills, and underground areas of the new world as their own. When Gruumsh, the evil god who later fathered the orc race, realized that there was no good portion of the world left for him, he grew black with rage. Seizing the caves, rocky cliffs, and sections of the darkness below that no one else wanted, he began to plot his revenge.

Gruumsh decided to build for himself a magnificent fortress directly on the surface of the world that the other gods had claimed. One by one, he tore out of the ground the towering trees that graced the forests. One by one, he stripped them of their branches and laid them atop one another to build a vast, crude structure to house the armies he intended to create. Gruumsh cleared miles upon miles of forested land in this way, leaving behind barren deserts upon which nothing would grow. Corellon Larethian, lord and creator of the earth’s vast forests, ordered him to cease — and the orc god’s reply was to seize Araushnee, a darkly beautiful goddess who was Corellon’s consort, and imprison her within his crude fortress.

Corellon would not be goaded so easily into fury. Choosing a tall, perfect tree, he fashioned its trunk into a magnificent longbow and made from its branches a set of true-flying arrows. From atop a mountain many miles away he nocked an arrow to his bow and fired upon Gruumsh’s fortress. Again and again he fired, and each of his arrows flew through some chink between the logs and found its mark, piercing the orc god’s body until his blood ran like a river, undermining the sandy base upon which he had built. Down crashed the fortress around Gruumsh’s ears, allowing Araushnee to escape.

Enraged, Gruumsh seized his morningstar and ran across the land to confront his enemy, all the while with Corellon’s arrows raining down upon him. The two gods clashed with a fury that rocked the newly born world. Furiously they fought for a day and a night. Araushnee, who hoped that Corellon’s death might give her the opportunity to rise as queen over the Seldarine, secretly aided the orc god. Other gods joined the fight on both sides, and fire rained down from the heavens. On and on went the divine battle thereafter known as the First War.

At last, the other gods began to withdraw, their strength and their fury spent. Gruumsh and Corellon fought on, the orc lord’s power waxing in the dark of night while Corellon gained in strength during the day. At last, Gruumsh’s greater physical strength and endurance began to prevail over Corellon’s dancing blade, and the orc god pressed his advantage. Corellon turned his stricken, bleeding face to the sky, and the tears of Sehanine Moonbow, another of the Seldarine, fell upon it, giving him the strength for a final strike. Turning back to his foe, Corellon plucked out Gruumsh’s eye with a single, well-placed sword stroke. The orc lord howled with pain and ran from the field of battle. Known as One-Eye forever after, he nurses his hatred of the Seldarine in the dark recesses of the world, plotting revenge.

Corellon gathered up the soil that had soaked up his blood and Sehanine’s tears and formed it into mortal beings of unearthly beauty, which he called elves. Corellon fashioned elves in the image of each member of the Seldarine, then set them upon the earth to be its stewards. Infused with the divine power of gods’ blood and tears, the elves took control of earth’s forested lands, seas, and skies.

Araushnee’s treachery did not go unpunished. For her betrayal, Araushnee was cast out of the Seldarine and transformed into a demonic spider-form. Renaming herself Lolth, she called to the elves created in her image, the drow, and retreated with them beneath the earth. Sehanine Moonbow, whose tears had given Corellon strength in his time of need and whose silver light had revealed Araushnee’s evil, became Corellon’s new consort.

Seeing the creations of the Seldarine, the other gods scrambled to emulate them. However, their hurry was too great, and each of their creations was but a flawed, forlorn imitation of the magnificent elves. Because of these flaws, the other races could not live as long as elves or reach the same heights of civilization. Still, the elves were kind to those races that had good hearts and helped them to establish themselves. The orcs, however, seek always to avenge themselves on the elves for their god’s mutilation, and the two races have nursed a deep-seated enmity ever since. (Races of the Wild, 2005, p. 25)

As the year 2000 approached, I was using a significant amount of the dissociative psychedelic drug dextromethorphan, and having a lot of visions of David Hasselhoff. I thought I was Brahmā and he was Viṣṇu, both of which at a certain level might become true but which are still pretty questionable, but then I met an angel that David was telling me was my twin soul.

Her name was initially presented as being ‘Vijayanti,’ in connection with Viṣṇu's Vaijayantī necklace, but years later I gave her the name Phoebe, as her personality is very, very warm. She immediately became my favorite angel and has stayed as such, even though I've gone through many changes in how I've connected with others. As our theurgical story developed, I slowly began to realize that she is the presence in my life of Goddess Lakṣmī, whose manifestation closer to my level is Sehanine.

The story of Gruumsh and Araushnee in relation to Corellon and Sehanine is colorful but very realistic to what those years (1998 to 2007) were for me. I was very in love with my cousin, and based on previous levels of mythological interest with the Hare Krishnas I shared ideas with her about the two of us being the likes of Rādhā and Kṛṣṇa. I thought of her as a divine consort (though, admittedly, we were pretty low-level in the theurgical ascension process), but I gradually drifted in my own dissociative world and its tug of war with “The Hoff.”

Eventually, we separated and divorced, as the war continued between me and my “Gruumsh,” until a very vivid salvation experience brought me much closer to angelic “Phoebe.” At that point, 2007 I believe, I knew that she had replaced all others as the significant divine presence in my life, though I did not yet put all the pieces together in terms of Dungeons & Dragons mythology. I did eventually in those years recognize the Corellon / Araushnee part of the story in connection with the Biblical Adam and Lilith, and wrote to my cousin (then ex-wife) saying so.

Here's where I have to learn to tell my story a little more carefully. I got into trouble with the judment of stalking, so I have to give a truthful account of this last decade and then the shift of 2016 in such a fashion as to not seem like I'm referencing certain (now) ex-friends, whom for a year or two recently I had thought were becoming part of this theurgical ascension. For this explanation of my Seldarine interests, I have to be more exacting than I think I probably should be with Sehanine's present relationship environment, but I will try to give a very quality elaboration so that the audience can get a better sense of what it is I think I'm doing with my (eternal) life.

I actually met the person I think is Sehanine Moonbow a decade ago, but her personality is so mild that I found it easy enough to respect the life she had already built for herself. I communicated both in writing and face-to-face with her and her partner back when I had suspicions that they were two (“Phoebe” and “Apocryphon”) of my four significant guardian angels. We had a type of peaceful co-existence for years, but mythological tensions developed and erupted in the course of Lilithian (Dark Seldarine) misunderstandings.

I've been told by a court judge not to express myself creatively in a way that suggests certain likenesses, but I don't know how to entirely remove myself from what my life has become, even if there are similarities between some various stories. Despite some common details, significant differences do exist between ideas I had about specific persons, and if I need to defend the truths I'm referencing now, I probably can, for some friendships actually have continued where spiritualities and chemistries are apparently more tolerant. I don't like having to ‘use’ any of these relativities for such explanations, but realism as I've been trying to work with it is very important to me.

here's a section about becoming Agni and all that
some theurgy stuff, apology to friends for exposure, and the likes of that, maybe
I'm a little slow with the site creation, but this is sensitive material